Opinions

Des asked my opinion on something today. It was an important decision with lots of pros and cons both way.

She was teetering back and forth.

Which meant that whatever opinion I had was what she would end up doing. It would add a few pounds to that side of the teeter totter, and off she'd go.

Now, for a normal person this might not seem like too horrible a spot to be put in. But it was simply too much power, too much responsibility, for my fragile little mind.

I mean, if she's going to do whatever I say, doesn't that make me fundamentally responsible for the outcomes of my decision? What if I don't clearly understand the problem? What if I try to pick what will make her happy, and instead she ends up miserable? How can I bear the weight of such a decision?

So of course, I attempted to redirect. I suggested getting more information, asking around, and so forth. I hoped I sounded reasonable, and not like I was trying to avoid constructing an Opinion.

However, I'm a terrible bluffer. She saw right through that and punched holes in my feeble delay tactics.

Time to try again... I just want you to be happy. You know, so do the happy choice. I hoped this get her to tip her hand as to what option would genuinely make her happier. I should have known better... if the decision was that easy, she would have made it without me. "What would make me happy? What would make me happy? What would make me happy is if you put actual thought into your reply and came up with a real opinion of your own instead of just trying to make me happy!"

I'm not sure if my failure to comprehend that is because it makes no sense or because I make no sense. Either way, an insufficient quantity of sense was being made.

I thought about it for a while. Or rather, I had a meta-thought process where I thought about the conversation itself instead of what she actually wanted me to think about. I decided that the only thing worse than doing what I said would be doing the opposite of what I said. "Should I wear the white or green dress?" "Green." Pause. "Really? Wow. I'm going with white. Thanks anyway." See, that makes me wonder why bother asking for my opinion in the first place, if you already seem to know exactly what you are going to do.

At any rate, eventually a decision was made, and I tried hard for it not to be me who made it. Not all by myself at any rate. I think it went well (but that's just my opinion).